Amsterdam Guide

With its tree lined canals and beautiful streets Amsterdam is a Blah Blah Blah!

Sorry, I’ll have to stop that nonsense there and get a few ground rules covered!

This is NOT one of those ghastly family guides to Amsterdam. If you’re after that drivel then head over to iamsterdam.

What we’re all about here is helping You – The Distinguished, yet slightly warped gentleman make the most of his visit to Amsterdam. I’m not talking about the parks and the butterfly sanctuary, wait until you’re 80 to do that.

No, what we do is tell you where to party, tell you where to get the best weed and cannabis, and if whoring is in your nature – well we have a guide for that too.

Regretfully there is no filth on this site as we run a clean establishment, but what we do is give you the knowledge and tools – the rest is entirely up to you!

Some of our guides can be found below, the rest are dotted around:
Good day to you all and enjoy your visit.

Amsterdam Player Facts

• Amsterdam has a porn supermarket – and it’s goods are better that want you’ll find at your local Tescos or Wal-Mart

• There are over 300 coffee shops which sell soft drugs – no calling the skanky dealer in the middle of the night here.

• Some of the women in the red light district are HOT – not like the awful creatures you find on the corner of Birkbury Avenue.

• There are 2 sex museums in Amsterdam. But don’t believe the other guides – they are crap and not for your average or even low rate player!

• Prices for doing your thing in the red light district are normally 50 euros for 15 minutes. But for your player it may be a bit more as unusual things cost!

• There are 4 live sex theatres – great for stag parties and worth a look in when you’re warming up before the real action.

• The coffee shops sell “space cakes” for about 5 Euros. Do not let the soft name fool you – these suckers are strong! But well worth trying.

Amsterdam Standard Tourist Facts

• Population: 1.36 million

• 4.2 million visitors annually

• 5th most popular tourist destination in Europe

• Amsterdam has more Canals than Venice

• Amsterdam is rated one of the top 25 safest Cities in the world.

• There are over 500,000 bicycles in Amsterdam

• Capital city of the Netherlands

• Amsterdam stock exchange – is the oldest stock exchange in the world

• Language: Dutch

• Currency: Euro